Description

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Why do you immediately click with some people while others just as inexplicably turn you off? Do people emit vibes? Is it possible to read a room? Are bad habits contagious?

Kate Murphy, author of the international bestseller You’re Not Listening, answers these and other fascinating questions in Why We Click, the first book that explores the emerging science and outsize impact of interpersonal synchrony, the most consequential social dynamic most people have never heard of. Interpersonal synchrony is the seemingly magical, yet now scientifically documented, tendency of human beings to fall into rhythm and find resonance with one another.

Not only do we subconsciously match one another’s movements, postures, facial expressions, and gestures; recent breakthroughs in technology have revealed we also sync up our heart rates, blood pressure, brainwaves, pupil dilation, and hormonal activity. The result is that emotions, moods, attitudes, and subsequent behaviors can be as infectious as any disease, and can have just as profound an impact on our health and well-being.

Interweaving science, philosophy, literature, history, business management theory, pop-culture, and plenty of relatable, real world examples, Why We Click explains why being “in sync,” “in tune,” “in step,” and “on the same wavelength” are more than just turns of phrase. From the bedroom to the boardroom and beyond, Murphy reveals with characteristic curiosity, concision, and wit how our instinct to sync with others drives much of our behavior and how our deepest desires—to be known, admired, loved, and connected—are so often thwarted in modern life.

About the Author

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Journalist Kate Murphy's eclectic essays and articles for The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, The Economist, Agence France-Presse, and Texas Monthly have been shared and commented on by millions. She is known for her fresh and accessible style and ability to distill complex subjects, particularly the science behind human interactions. Her first book, You’re Not Listening: What You’re Missing and Why It Matters, was published in thirty-two languages and has become required reading in interpersonal communication courses at high schools, colleges, and universities worldwide. Kate lives in Houston, Texas, and holds a commercial pilot’s license.

Praise For…

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"In a world where loneliness is skyrocketing and connection feels harder than ever, Murphy's book is a must-have resource. Why We Click is a fascinating, science-backed reminder that the joy we seek so often begins in rhythm with the people around us."
—Laurie Santos, professor of psychology at Yale University and host of The Happiness Lab podcast

"Why We Click is a searching and fascinating exploration of the up-and-coming science of human connection. Kate Murphy describes, in lucid terms, not only the foundation of the seemingly effortless link between people, but also the devastating consequences of its absence — all too relevant in a world where digital virtualities are draining real-life interaction from our lives."
—Thomas Lewis, psychiatrist, adjunct professor at UCSF and author of A General Theory of Love

"From start to finish, Why We Click dives deep into how we relate, communicate, and sync our behavior in fascinating and perplexing ways. It’s a captivating journey through the science behind the powerful, yet invisible forces that synchronize human behavior."
—Danny Meyer, Shake Shack founder, executive chairman of Union Square Hospitality Group and author of Setting the Table

“As journalist Murphy (You’re Not Listening, 2020) explains in this absorbing book, interpersonal synchrony is the tendency people have to fall into rhythm with each other…Murphy proves that, as infectious as a disease, and just as crucial to our health, this human superpower cannot be underestimated.”
—Booklist

"Why We Click is popular science at its best. Kate Murphy takes a universal yet mysterious experience—our sense of connection with others—and reveals the surprising science that explains it. Through vivid stories and carefully-conducted research, Murphy transforms an experience that once felt mysterious and magical into something that is perfectly understandable. You’ll end this book feeling like you’ve gotten a new pair of crystal-clear glasses to see your social world through. It’s engaging, insightful, and hard to put down!"
—Nicholas Epley, professor of behavioral science at the University of Chicago Booth School of Business and author of Mindwise and A Little More Social